Do not consider this funny. It is with such actions, anti-nationals and divisive elements Jignesh Mevani, Kanhaiya Kumar, Umar Khalid, Hardik Patel, Alpesh Patel, Shehla Rashid are born.

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Judge*: You had raised the slogan of Bharat honge tukde tukde?
*Prisoner*: Yes, I did.

Judge: You raised the slogan of “Pakistan Zindabad”?
Prisoner: Yes, I did.

Judge: You opposed and insulted our National flag and the National Anthem?
Prisoner: Yes, I did.

Judge: Did you support terrorism and Naxalism?
Prisoner: Yes, I did.

Judge: You supported extremists to take up arms against the police? And even kill them?
Prisoner: Yes, I did.

Judge: You had a dinner party to celebrate the martyrdom of CRPF and Army soldiers?
Prisoner: Yes, I had.

Judge: You encouraged extremists to damage government property? Which they did?
Prisoner: Yes, I encouraged.

Judge: You waved the Pakistani flag and declared your support to them?
Prisoner: Yes, I did.

Judge: Why did you do this? You know what the punishment is?
Prisoner: Yes, I have done this very thoughtfully. Before that I was an anonymous person, longing for small things, but since then I have come under the category of Honourable and respected citizens of India. There are lot of national leaders who support me.

Big leaders of national regional parties like Rahul Gandhi, Sonia Gandhi, Lalu Prasad Yadav, Mayawati, Akhilesh Yadav, Mamata Banerjee, Sharad Pawar, Deve Gowda, Sitaram Yechury, Farokh Abdullah, Arvind Kejriwal are desperate to meet me. I am a hero in their eyes!

They constantly keep calling me on phone all day. My ideas and ideology are churning out good political benefits. I am already very rich and famous!

Hundreds of journalists like Ravish Kumar, Rajdeep Sardesai, Barkha Dutt, Rahul Kanwal, Nidhi Razdan have elevated me to be a national hero.

Mega Bollywood’s stars stand up for me at midnight and support me wholeheartedly, including monetary help.

I am hailed as the real hero of the country and am compared to Shahid Bhagat Singh and Nehru.

Articles are written in print media about me while TV channels debate me.

Yesterday I was worried, looking for a small job, today there are offers from big parties to contest the legislative elections! I do not know how already crores of rupees have come into my account.

Judge: But this is treason! You can be prosecuted for treason.

Prisoner: No problem! The country’s biggest lawyers, who charge several lakhs per hearing, like Kapil Sibal, Abhishek Manu Singhvi, Prashant Bhushan will advocate free for me. People who had the power to open courts at midnight in for Yakub Memon, Ajmal Kasab and Afzal Guru will take me out. Or it will take the judicial system 20 years or more to give me punishment. But then my lawyers will take the matter to a higher court! People of this country only lick the boots of famous persons; they do not see the deceit and character of that person. Look at me! Today I have crores of fans. And those millions of people think I am God!

Any anyone opposing me and my ideology gets branded as fascist, bigot, vigilantes, right wing fool, etc.

Do not consider this funny. It is with such actions, anti-nationals and divisive elements Jignesh Mevani, Kanhaiya Kumar, Umar Khalid, Hardik Patel, Alpesh Patel, Shehla Rashid are born.

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